Manipulation in Disguise: How Emotional Vulnerabilities Are Exploited in Programmes and Services
A couple of years ago, a video surfaced in my Facebook feed, one that a friend had engaged with. Boasting over a million views, it caught my attention, prompting me to see what had piqued their interest. I was already familiar with the influencer behind it and had found their methods questionable, but I was curious as to what my friend might have found compelling. What I watched was five minutes of relentless manipulation—tapping into emotional vulnerabilities without offering any substantive insight. It was nothing more than an exercise in amplifying feelings of confinement and distress. This experience led me to reflect on how widespread these tactics have become across various fields, including therapy, coaching, and wellness.
All too often, manipulation begins long before a client commits to a programme, package, or service. Practitioners prey on emotional insecurities, guiding individuals towards commitments that often fail to deliver the promised depth. Once the transaction is complete, the value frequently falls short, with content that barely scratches the surface. Having worked in the wellness industry for many years, I have witnessed these strategies repeatedly. My aim with this post is to offer insight, so you can approach such decisions with clarity, choosing what truly supports your growth.
How Manipulation Works
Manipulation often begins subtly. Practitioners may focus on amplifying insecurities, highlighting unresolved emotional pain points, and reinforcing a narrative that, without their particular programme or service, you will remain stuck. This creates a sense of urgency, making you feel that their solution is not only necessary but also time-sensitive. It is easy to be drawn in, especially when you are in a vulnerable state, seeking guidance or answers.
The use of these manipulative tactics, however, can do more harm than simply misleading clients. For individuals who have already experienced deep emotional or psychological wounds, these strategies can be retraumatising. When a practitioner continually pokes at pain points without offering real solutions, they risk reopening old wounds rather than facilitating healing. This can lead to further emotional distress, undermining the very foundation of trust and safety that is essential in any therapeutic or coaching relationship.
In therapeutic or coaching environments, establishing a sense of safety and trust is fundamental to fostering genuine healing. The use of pain points to drive action violates these core principles, as it often relies on fear or discomfort to coerce decisions. True healing cannot take place when the focus is on exploitation rather than genuine support, and when clients feel manipulated, their ability to trust the practitioner—and by extension, the process—can be significantly damaged.
The Illusion of Value
The manipulation often begins before you even commit. Practitioners can craft seemingly well-structured offerings that promise transformation but are designed to exploit emotional pain points. They may use impressive language to present their programmes as comprehensive solutions, but upon closer examination, these offerings frequently lack real depth. While they may sound convincing, the actual content often doesn’t address the root issues, leaving you stuck in a cycle of seeking more. When progress stalls, some practitioners may even shift the blame onto the client, suggesting that some inherent defect or “resistance” is the reason for the lack of results, rather than acknowledging the shortcomings of the programme itself.
These programmes often include just enough insight to keep you engaged, yet the genuine empowerment or clarity you seek remains elusive. This sense of unresolved progress can create a subtle dependency on the practitioner, prompting you to invest further—whether through additional sessions or other tools they offer—without truly moving towards meaningful growth.
Recognising the Signs of Manipulation
As someone who has spent many years in this industry, I have learned how to spot the subtle warning signs that often indicate manipulative practices. Here are a few things to look out for when evaluating whether a programme or service is truly going to serve your growth:
- Is There a Constant Focus on Your Insecurities?
Do they continually remind you of your emotional struggles, reinforcing the idea that without their help, you will not find a way out? This tactic keeps you dependent on their solutions. - Are You Pressured to Act Quickly?
Limited-time offers, urgent calls to action, and warnings that opportunities will disappear unless you act immediately are common ways to bypass careful thought. This creates an artificial sense of urgency, pushing you into decisions that may not serve you in the long term. - Is the Substance Truly Meaningful, or Merely Dressed Up?
Practitioners can claim to offer deep, transformative solutions using impressive language and polished presentation. However, this doesn’t always translate to real value. Be cautious of programmes that sound compelling on the surface but lack meaningful substance when examined closely. Are you being offered genuine tools and insights, or just vague promises cleverly packaged to appear valuable? - Do You Feel Empowered or Dependent?
The goal of any therapeutic or coaching relationship should be to make you more self-reliant, not dependent on continued sessions or interventions. If you feel as though you are being drawn into an endless cycle of needing more help, it may be time to reassess. - Does the Programme Offer Simplistic Solutions to Complex Issues?
Real personal growth is nuanced and does not happen overnight. Be wary of anyone offering a one-size-fits-all approach to deep-seated emotional or psychological struggles.
Making Empowered Decisions
When seeking help—whether from a therapist, coach, or wellness practitioner—it is crucial to stay grounded and assess what you are being offered with a clear mind. The goal of any genuine service should be to empower you, to provide you with the tools to navigate your challenges and move forward independently.
Trust your instincts. If something feels too good to be true, or if you find yourself being pushed to act before you’re ready, step away. Real support allows you to make decisions that feel right for you, without pressure or coercion.
Ultimately, true growth comes from within, supported by professionals who foster your independence, not your dependence. By staying alert to these manipulative tactics, you can ensure that your decisions—whether personal, emotional, or financial—are always aligned with your best interests.